Single Dads by Choice: How Surrogacy Makes Fatherhood Possible.

By Dr. Naman Arya, MD, MPH, MSHCM

Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility Division at Surrogacy4All.

Introduction

In recent years, an increasing number of single men have chosen to become fathers through surrogacy. Advancements in reproductive technology and evolving societal norms have made this path to parenthood more accessible. This guide explores the journey of single dads by choice, highlighting the process, legal aspects, and personal experiences that define this unique path to fatherhood.

The Rise of Single Fatherhood via Surrogacy

The desire to become a parent is universal, transcending marital status and gender. For single men, surrogacy offers a viable route to fatherhood. Studies have shown that motivations for single men pursuing surrogacy include a strong desire for a genetic connection to their child, the absence of a suitable partner, and the aspiration to nurture and raise a child independently.

Understanding the Surrogacy Process for Single Men

1. Initial Consultation and Medical Evaluation

The journey begins with a consultation at a fertility clinic. Here, the intended father undergoes medical evaluations, including semen analysis and genetic testing, to assess fertility health and identify any potential genetic concerns.

2. Selecting an Egg Donor

 Single men require an egg donor to create embryos. Donors can be anonymous or known, and selection is based on various factors such as physical characteristics, educational background, and personal preferences.

3. Embryo Creation and Transfer

Using the intended father’s sperm and the donor’s eggs, embryos are created through in vitro fertilization (IVF). A selected embryo is then transferred to the surrogate’s uterus in hopes of achieving a successful pregnancy.

4. Legal Agreements

Legal contracts are essential to outline the rights and responsibilities of all parties involved. These agreements address parental rights, compensation, and other critical aspects to ensure clarity and protection for everyone.

5. Pregnancy and Birth

Throughout the pregnancy, the intended father maintains communication with the surrogate, attending medical appointments and providing support. Upon birth, legal steps are taken to establish the intended father’s parental rights, which vary depending on jurisdiction.

Legal Considerations

Surrogacy laws differ globally and even within countries. In the United States, states like California, Connecticut, and New Hampshire are known for being surrogacy-friendly, allowing single men to establish parental rights through pre-birth orders. Conversely, some countries have restrictive laws; for instance, Greece has recently announced plans to prohibit surrogacy for single men and male same-sex couples.

Financial Aspects

Surrogacy can be a significant financial investment. In the U.S., costs can exceed $150,000, covering medical procedures, legal fees, surrogate compensation, and agency fees. However, countries like Colombia and Mexico offer more affordable options, with costs ranging from $70,000 to $80,000, while still providing reliable legal frameworks for single men.

Personal Stories: Inspiration from Single Dads

Nathan Chan’s Journey

Nathan Chan, a single father from Canada, faced numerous challenges, including adoption rejections and failed embryo transfers. Undeterred, he pursued surrogacy and is now a proud father of three children born via different surrogates. His experience led him to establish Proud Fertility, a consultancy aimed at assisting others on similar paths.

George Northwood’s Decision

Renowned hairdresser George Northwood chose surrogacy to fulfill his dream of fatherhood. Opting for the UK route, he embraced the process despite its complexities, finding liberation in his decision to become a single dad.

Andy Cohen’s Parenthood

Television host Andy Cohen welcomed two children via surrogacy, sharing his journey openly and inspiring many. His story underscores the evolving landscape of family structures, and the possibilities surrogacy offers to single men.

Overcoming Societal Stereotypes

Single fathers by choice often confront societal misconceptions, such as the belief that children require both a mother and a father or that men are less nurturing. However, numerous studies and personal accounts demonstrate that children raised by single fathers through surrogacy thrive in loving and supportive environments.

Building a Support System

Embarking on the surrogacy journey as a single man necessitates a strong support network. Engaging with family, friends, and support groups can provide emotional assistance and practical advice throughout the process. Additionally, professional counseling services can offer guidance and support during the transition to parenthood.

Conclusion

Surrogacy has opened new avenues for single men to realize their dreams of fatherhood. While the journey involves legal, financial, and emotional considerations, the experiences of single dads by choice highlight the profound fulfillment and joy that come with raising a child. As societal perceptions continue to evolve, the path for single men to become parents through surrogacy becomes increasingly accessible and accepted.