Becoming a Single Mother - Adopting for Single Women

Adoption is a deeply personal and often complex process. For a complete understanding, we encourage you to explore our detailed course dedicated to this topic.

In the meantime, let’s examine the two primary adoption paths — U.S. domestic infant adoption and intercountry adoption — both of which typically involve similar costs and timelines.

The 10 Core Steps of U.S. Domestic Infant Adoption

Domestic infant adoption in the U.S. usually follows ten key stages, though the exact order and process can vary depending on whether the adoption is agency-based or private (independent).

Agency Adoption

In an agency adoption, adoptive parents work with a state-licensed adoption agency. The agency manages — or helps coordinate — most steps of the adoption process, including home studies, expectant parent matching, counseling, and legal finalization.

Private (Independent) Adoption

In a private adoption, prospective parents typically work directly with an attorney who facilitates critical steps such as connecting with expectant parents and managing legal documentation.
Even in private adoptions, agencies may still assist with components like the home study or post-placement visits.

Costs and timelines are generally comparable between both routes.

Open vs. Closed Adoption

A central consideration for adoptive parents is how much contact or communication to maintain with the child’s birth parents after placement — commonly referred to as the degree of openness.

Research suggests that when all parties agree to ongoing updates or communication, overall satisfaction tends to be higher for birth parents, adoptive parents, and adoptees alike. However, every situation is unique, and boundaries should be established thoughtfully.

Adoptive families should also be prepared for potential microaggressions or insensitive comments related to adoption. Studies show that children benefit greatly when parents openly and regularly discuss their adoption story, helping foster self-confidence and identity development.

Transracial and Transcultural Adoption

Many adoptions are transracial or transcultural, meaning the child and adoptive parents come from different racial or cultural backgrounds.
Research consistently shows the best outcomes occur when families embrace and integrate the child’s birth culture, participate in cultural traditions, and engage with communities that reflect their child’s heritage. This connection strengthens identity, pride, and belonging.

Single Parent Adoption

In the U.S., nearly all states explicitly allow single adults to adopt. Where the law is silent, the wording typically permits “any adult person” to adopt, regardless of marital status.

However, in practice, the success of a single parent’s adoption journey depends largely on two factors:

1. The home study evaluation, where a social worker assesses financial stability, emotional preparedness, and parenting readiness.

2. The preferences of the expectant mother, who may have her own ideas about what kind of family she wants for her child.

It’s crucial to work with agencies and attorneys that have experience supporting single-parent adoptions and can connect you with expectant parents open to that path.

While some birth parents prefer two-parent households for perceived stability, others see single parents as offering a more predictable and peaceful environment — one free from the potential of separation or divorce.